Oppression
It is three a.m. I am suddenly wide awake. I have been roused by the moon; through the borrowed light that deceptively shines. The light that first appears to be as bright as day is merely a reflection of the true light of day. Soon this is made evident to me as all that is visible is reduced to shadow. Man and animal, friend and foe, are not discernible one from the other. They have been made equal in appearance by the deceiving glow.
Thinking the deep night to be morning, my thoughts and dreams begin to blend. Anxiety rises as all that I have forced to the back of my mind during the preceding days suddenly, comes to the forefront in its starkest reality. I cry out to God for my children and wonder, how long one can cry for their children? I have been crying out for them night and day for very many years. I beg God to bring them back to Him. I know they can never be safe unless they are in Him. Without Him, they remain captive to the enemy. Jesus is the only one who can make them free.
I rise with the sun and go about my day but the dark night hangs all about me still. This spiritually dark cloud that lingers and is not dispelled by the radiance of the sun. My spirit is heavy, weighed down, and afraid. By the power of my thoughts, night's dark wing is allowed to brush me and cut me with the invisible precision of paper. In my spirit, I am sliced from head to toe with hundreds of invisible cuts; and then they begin to bleed. The Life that is in me that I know to be the Holy Spirit of the Living God seems to be oozing out of me and leaving me. Deception fills my heart and mind as Satan rushes to fill the space that God's Spirit has left behind. He shines his false light into my mind just as the moon glows with light it borrows from the sun. This light he borrows from He who is the Light of the world; and twists it as if deflecting it with mirrors, deceiving me with hopeless thoughts.
As the day grows so does the intensity of my despair. Thoughts that blind me to reality. With my mind and heart in deepest gloom, I can't tell my friends from my enemies. With thinking deeply shadowed and muddied, I reach to embrace my friend and embrace instead, my enemy. I cry out in pain and fear and attack mistakenly, my friend. I cry, and cry until I can cry no more.
The heaviness of my spirit has fully enveloped me. As I lie upon my bed, I feel Satan pressing down hard upon me. He seeks to smother me and with glee, he whispers that I would be better off dead. He tells me that life is just too painful to bear. He reasons with me that my children are damned and will never return to God. They have no desire for Him he coldly states. He breaths hopelessness into me as I curl into a fetal ball longing for my mother's womb. As I curl ever tighter into myself, I am surprised to find Jesus there! Then I remember that Jesus lives in me, and I am in Him, and together we are in God. Satan has no hold over me and there is never hopelessness in God!
Suddenly, the Son rises in my heart and day begins to burn brightly again as in my joy, I cry simply, "Jesus!" At the sound of this Name, Satan has to flee and the inky black that gripped my spirit is dispelled. The bloodletting of Spirit is ended and the cuts left by night's dark wing begin to heal, as God's Spirit fills once again the empty space within me that Satan sought so hard to steal.
My joy I have found again and I am awed that it was truly never lost but only hidden. Jesus will never leave me even when I am deceived and blunder my way away from Him. Simply by whispering His Name, all spiritual oppression is lifted and hope for my children and indeed, all humankind is fully restored. This is so simple that I am most likely to forget it again and be roused once more to deception, by the one who desires to be in the place of the Most High. My flesh is weak but each time I falter, I am becoming sooner to remember the Name that fills my spirit with the power to walk according to the Spirit and not according to my flesh. I am ceasing to walk according to my weakness.
Spiritual oppression no longer has a lasting hold on me! All to the glory of, Jesus! Amen!
Thinking the deep night to be morning, my thoughts and dreams begin to blend. Anxiety rises as all that I have forced to the back of my mind during the preceding days suddenly, comes to the forefront in its starkest reality. I cry out to God for my children and wonder, how long one can cry for their children? I have been crying out for them night and day for very many years. I beg God to bring them back to Him. I know they can never be safe unless they are in Him. Without Him, they remain captive to the enemy. Jesus is the only one who can make them free.
I rise with the sun and go about my day but the dark night hangs all about me still. This spiritually dark cloud that lingers and is not dispelled by the radiance of the sun. My spirit is heavy, weighed down, and afraid. By the power of my thoughts, night's dark wing is allowed to brush me and cut me with the invisible precision of paper. In my spirit, I am sliced from head to toe with hundreds of invisible cuts; and then they begin to bleed. The Life that is in me that I know to be the Holy Spirit of the Living God seems to be oozing out of me and leaving me. Deception fills my heart and mind as Satan rushes to fill the space that God's Spirit has left behind. He shines his false light into my mind just as the moon glows with light it borrows from the sun. This light he borrows from He who is the Light of the world; and twists it as if deflecting it with mirrors, deceiving me with hopeless thoughts.
As the day grows so does the intensity of my despair. Thoughts that blind me to reality. With my mind and heart in deepest gloom, I can't tell my friends from my enemies. With thinking deeply shadowed and muddied, I reach to embrace my friend and embrace instead, my enemy. I cry out in pain and fear and attack mistakenly, my friend. I cry, and cry until I can cry no more.
The heaviness of my spirit has fully enveloped me. As I lie upon my bed, I feel Satan pressing down hard upon me. He seeks to smother me and with glee, he whispers that I would be better off dead. He tells me that life is just too painful to bear. He reasons with me that my children are damned and will never return to God. They have no desire for Him he coldly states. He breaths hopelessness into me as I curl into a fetal ball longing for my mother's womb. As I curl ever tighter into myself, I am surprised to find Jesus there! Then I remember that Jesus lives in me, and I am in Him, and together we are in God. Satan has no hold over me and there is never hopelessness in God!
Suddenly, the Son rises in my heart and day begins to burn brightly again as in my joy, I cry simply, "Jesus!" At the sound of this Name, Satan has to flee and the inky black that gripped my spirit is dispelled. The bloodletting of Spirit is ended and the cuts left by night's dark wing begin to heal, as God's Spirit fills once again the empty space within me that Satan sought so hard to steal.
My joy I have found again and I am awed that it was truly never lost but only hidden. Jesus will never leave me even when I am deceived and blunder my way away from Him. Simply by whispering His Name, all spiritual oppression is lifted and hope for my children and indeed, all humankind is fully restored. This is so simple that I am most likely to forget it again and be roused once more to deception, by the one who desires to be in the place of the Most High. My flesh is weak but each time I falter, I am becoming sooner to remember the Name that fills my spirit with the power to walk according to the Spirit and not according to my flesh. I am ceasing to walk according to my weakness.
Spiritual oppression no longer has a lasting hold on me! All to the glory of, Jesus! Amen!
1 Comments:
"Man and animal, friend and foe, are not discernible one from the other. They have been made equal in appearance by the deceiving glow."
Your imagery is very telling here. I often hear it proclaimed that we are all the same, that we are all in this together. But, "The heart knows its own bitterness, And a stranger does not share its joy." How few people have admitted -even if only to themselves- the gravity of the dread and anxiety they carry with them? These people are so presumptious -they think they know everyone, but they don't know anyone.
The truly great tasks cannot be the ones that are fulfilled automatically. If we are all the same automatically, then we are called to nothing great. How blessed is the one who searches out the darkness of his or her heart and then finds it removed!
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